The honeymoon's over

The last three weeks have been really busy. Not so much stressful because really, how hard is it to teach your 39th canoe class? "Boys and girls, what does PFD stand for?" But seriously, every day I have to win over at least two different groups of kids (about 30 of them) I've never met before, get them to respect me, learn their names, figure out what kind of group they are, go from 3rd graders to 8th graders, switch from teaching herpetology to pioneer tools to singing songs and doing entertaining skits (oh goodness!) at campfires, form some sort of connection with a good portion of the group, all while making sure nobody dies on my watch. It doesn't stress me out, it just exhausts me. I'm talking all day long pretty much. People are constantly asking me things. I like to talk as much as any other woman. The thing is, I enjoy talking to certain people not just talking in general. It's exhausting always having to coordinate with folks and make sure everybody knows what's going on and being nice and listening intently while you hear the dozenth story about what a kid did last weekend and satisfying everybody around you. I feel like a dang monkey.

This season we have about 18 folks on staff. And it's gotten to the point in the season where everybody is now comfortable with everybody and we know each other fairly well. But you better damn well believe that after dealing with children all day, I don't feel like coming back to an office full of them. Some people are so friggin helpless, it kills me. I can't spell shit out for a grown person. It annoys me too much. It's not like I have an issue with any person in particular (I really do like almost all of my co-workers and I can say something nice about all of them). I'm just tired of always having coordinate with others.

You know in job interviews how they ask if you work well with others? I cross my fingers and say yes. I don't work well with most folks--I apparently have high standards, am independent for the most part, Tess has informed me that she's noticed that I'm a closeted control freak, and I tend to jump to conclusions/am judgemental. I work pretty good with certain people. Me and Mandy get each other--we don't have to explain every single step in our thought process. We just do. Like I tell kids a lot--sittin ain't doin. I get really frustrated when folks standin around just jaw-jabbing. It's a waste of time and there's nothing that pisses me off worse than somebody wasting my time. Shut the hell up and do it. GEEZE.

I think what I'm dyin for is for a weekend away. A weekend of quiet. A weekend of relaxation. A weekend of no planning.

That'll have to wait. We're goin to Charleston this weekend and I'm gonna have a friggin blast. I'll check you fools later.

Waiting for the splat

So now that 'we're on,' I have a problem: my mom. She's your typical mom who worries. But I'm afraid that State, as well as National Parks, will be called when she finds out about PROJECT ESCAPADE. The shit will hit the fan. Any advice?

We're on.

We bought our plane tickets to Boston last night. That's right, we're fully committed to this AT thing. And there you were, sittin, doubtin my intent. Don't doubt me. I do what I say I'm gonna do (for the most part). Beginning of June, I'll be there. We're stayin in Boston overnight because our ride won't get there till the next day. I'm hoping we can go check out a Red-Sox game. Maybe go to Mike's and get some doughnuts. Doughnuts.....yum. And then two months roughin it. I'm so excited!!

The SEC wildlife conclave was here at THE ROCK a couple weeks ago (all the wildlife schools from the SEC flocked here for a competition to see who knows more shit). My grad school advisor was there and apparently I have a desk reserved and a stipend. So grad school is a definite go. Fun, huh?

Fun Pictures

It's been a while since I've put pictures on the computer so here's a nice conglomoration....check out my shutterfly page for more fun:

Katie with her squirrel (cool, huh?!)

A few hours ago.....I'm almost too good at slip-n-sliding

Katie, the Red-tailed Hawk, from when the falconer came a few weeks ago

Turkey hunting this morning

Oscar night glamour included my filo-dough cardboard box to smash houseflies with

Us girls fishin on the dock

We are B.A.Bs, not P.A.B

Look! Our invisible turkey!!

All in all, a damn fine weekend

Yesterday we fished, laid out, fished, and watched Blood Diamond (when did Leonardo DiCaprio get hot?). The movie was actually really good and I'm not even into bloody/gory ones. This mornin, me and Adam went turkey hunting and then me and the girls tried out our new slip-n-slide. Did I catch a single fish yesterday and did he shoot a turkey today? That's a negatory. Is my ass completely worn out from having such an action-packed, outdoorsy weekend? Hell yeah it is and it's a little on the crispy side, too. Maybe next time I'll rethink that no-sunscreen-idea.

Growing up, my dad use to take me fishin a lot. I always loved it. I used to catch fish all the time. Not so much these days. Maybe it's because I'm no longer fishing with a kite-string and bread in the Swan Pond where there are so many sunfish that they're practically begging you to take them home and let them live in your toliet. Or it might have something to do with my almost perfect ability to get the best lures caught in trees (I'm not dumb, sometimes I'm just so excited to cast that I don't think about what's right above me). Anyway, yesterday we could see these huge bass right where we were casting but they weren't having any of it. We used worms, rooster tails, crappie jigs, plastic minnows. Nothing. But Luke was having better luck than the rest of us and he told me he used some shiny thing. I'll look for it next time I'm at the store but that tackle aisle is pretty intimidating--big men just staring at you like they know exactly how much of a dumbass you are. Well, except for the nice older black men. They're always friendly. Anyway back to the story, when I could see like 4 of those huge bass my heart started pounding and I was having more-than-usual trouble tieing my lures on (I'm not good with knots of any kind...my brain doesn't work that way). And even though it didn't amount to me gettin a picture taken with even a 1/2 lb bass, I had a good time. But I'm telling you, by May, there will be a picture of me holding a fish up. Granted, it might only be a mosquito fish, but I'm gonna get one.

We used our new slip-n-slide this afternoon. I look like I got knee-cap-inplants and I have bruises all down my forearms, but I had a damn good time.

Bullshit David, pull up your pants!!

Yesterday was a day for the books.

During one of my classes, I had all the kids sitting on a log facing me while I was standing up talking. I saw two little boys snickering and whispering while looking at my hip level. Yeah, my zipper was totally unzipped. Unzipped in front of 16 fifth graders. I've scarred them for life.

But what took the cake is somethin I said last night. My group was late for their night class because they had all gone to the gift shop. So they finally come in 15 minutes late and I was ready to start. They had all bought these mini-Georgia-footballs that when you squeeze, they play the UGA alma mater. Of course they kept squeezing them. So I said, "Alrite, ya'll, I'm a huge Georgia fan too, but try not to squeeze your balls."

Last season I gave myself the Native American name, Foot In Mouth. I think it's pretty fitting.

DIXIE CHICKS RULE

I watched the Dixie Chicks documentary "Shut Up and Sing" last night. Love those girls. LOVE THEM. I'm not up for debating the first ammendment and where it is applicable in our society so we'll just leave it at that.

What dreams may come

The last dream I had this morning was of me catchin a nice crappie. So I figured it's Sunday--the best day to go fishin. I got out in the canoe and paddled around. In reality, nothin even nibbled. I'm not sure how to solve the mystery of the fish in this lake (it's not just me, either). I talked to some men that are always fishin on the lake and they gave me some tips. One day I'll catch me a 10lb bass and then I'll get Josh to mount it or somethin. Anybody else have any tips?

A falconer's coming here in a few minutes. For those of you not in the know, a falconer is a person who has a bird of prey of some sort. He/she trains the bird to hunt and then return back to glove. So you basically get to watch the raptor hunt. Awesome, huh? Yeah, I'll let ya'll know.

Boss JA showed Adam his jamaquack!

Simon and Garfunkle, yeah, I've heard of them...

a pharmaceutical company, right?

The other day I was hanging out at the house, solo. An unusal occassion since I have three roomates. The phone rang. We have a landline and for extra fun, no caller id. It's like Christmas every time the phone rings because you never know who's gonna be on the other end. Most of the time it's one of the other houses calling to see what time we're partyin or whatever. I've gotten into the groove of answering the phone with whatever comes to mind. On this particular night, I WANTED to say "Gonoreaha" (I can't even spell that shit), but instead I went with "Crab Cakes!" An unknown male asked to talk to Tess M. "No, Tess M. isn't here right now," is what I responded with. "Crab cakes, what, is that your camp name?" "Um, no, I just felt like saying crab cakes. This isn't Tess's brother by any chance?" "No, this is Joe Somebody. I was just calling to let Tess know that I've been having trouble get a hold of her third reference but I'm still really interested in hiring her." "Yeah, that's what I was afraid of."

It was just one of those nights I was glad I didn't go with an STD.

I'm not beautiful like you, I'm beautiful like me!!!!!!! :)

I just had a bottle of peppermint extract in my pocket. And it leaked. This is me, pumped.

Peppermint extract, yeah, for the peppermint beetle activity. You smear the extract on trees and make the kids go around and look for the peppermint beetle by sniffin trees. What!?!!? It's educational.....

Kids rule.

So today, us girls were doing some oh-so-awesome-office-work and so were entertainin ourselves by talking. That's unusual, right? We started talkin about body image and how back in high school looks were everything to a lot of people. And we talked about how obsessed we were about the silliest things dealing with our looks (I once went eye-lashless because my wrist twitched while curling my eyelashes. I guess I didn't learn my lesson because I still curl them. The women in my family got screwed when it comes to eyelashes, leave me alone about that). And now, in our mid-twenties, we're slowing starting to accept ourselves. And we're realizing how much time and effort we wasted on obsessing over shit we just can't change. And most of the stuff we were worried about is what makes us us, and that we shouldn't want to change them. And that, in the end, to steal from a late and great fella, everything's gonna be alrite.

On the walk up for lunch, I had an epiphany. They seldom come so it was an exciting moment. Yep. Few and far between. Joyous occassion. Great fun. Anyway, most of us girls here have some sort of guy issue. They all pretty much boil down to the same thing--we just don't understand guys and why they act the way they do. And I've spent countless hours listening and talking about relationships with most of the girls here. And today I realized one of those God-awful things from the SAT: Body image crisis is to teenage years as Love life crisis is to the twenties.

So forget about Blake Shelton not being the future Mr. Nevena. Forget about Josh Holloway being married. Single-ness, raise your ugly head and blow a loogey on me. I can take it. I've gotten to where I like the way I look and, by God, I like the way I am. Some day, a guy's gonna feel the same way about me. And until that day comes, there's always re-runs of Lost to comfort myself with. And chocolate. And friends. And cheese. And burping. And winning spitting contests. And onions. And a new-found-love of cottage cheese. And movies. And birds. And hikes along the AT. And pooping. And manicures. And country music. And books. And family. And Mexican food. And beer. And Georgia Football. And dancing. And fishing. And running. And..........you fill in the rest.

Bummer.

Total soul devestating news: Blake Shelton is dating Miranda Lambert. I can't compete with that. And I don't want to. She's a cool chick (as far as I know...I've never met her). And she's got some rockin tunes. What's a girl to do??

Team Tuna did a nose dive

Adam came up to THE ROCK Friday night. He was my partner for Beer Pong. Yeah, we had an official beer pong tournament with brackets, rules written and posted, and everything. Ok, we live in the middle of no where and hardly ever see people other than each other, give us a break. We lost in the first round. This is me, totally not devestated, because beer pong is slightly lame. I prefer flip cup.

Friday nights have turned into drunken debauchery for me. Saturday mornings always greet me with "let's count how many are left in the 12 pack" regret. I'm a small person. Hell, last night I was gettin close off a beer and some nasty, pound-cake tasting shot (sorry Jellybean, we have different tastes). Two-thirds of a 12 pack is hell on my bowels (and vowels). My mom wanted me to give up alcohol for Lent. I've never been good at doing things people tell me to do.

Anyway, Friday was some good times. I couldn't believe Adam really came to visit. Even when he called and said he was going to, I still wasn't convinced. Beer pong at THE ROCK (you have to say it like Sean Connery), simply unresistable.

SUPER-DOOPER-SHIT-YOUR-PANTS-EXCITING-NEWS!!!

Guess who's touring with Brooks and Dunn this summer/fall and will be in ATLANTA in AUGUST?!?!? Guess. Ok, he's tall. And he's the only guy who can pull off a mullet. And I blog about him monthly. You guessed it! Alan Jackson!! This is me, jumping up and down and panting with excitement. I'll be taking suggestions for t-shirt crafting later. Love the ol' Alan. LOVE HIM. A LOT. Now, who wants to go with me? Jellybean? Any takers?! Hot dog!!

JENNIFER NETTLES ROCKS

Yesterday I rode up to Chattanooga with, as Boss Ja refers to them, 'the two bobs.' That would be Jellybean and her main squeeze, Bob. We pulled into a gas station just north of Atlanta. An elderly couple with Ontario plates pulled into the pump in front of us and the husband got out. He was kinda hunched over but seemed to be still-with-it for the most part. I heard him ask Bob how to work the pump. And I watched him chicken gallop around and try to figure out the gas pump (you figure with Ontario plates in Georgia, they might have had to stop for gas once or twice before but who am I to judge?). Anyway, I started chuckling when I read his only bumper sticker, "Keep honking. I'm reloading." They were driving an Escort or something; this was no pick-up kinda guy. He disappeared inside, and when he came back, he was carrying a plastic cup. Then, he opened up his trunk and pulled out a 2-liter of coke and a bottle of whiskey. He handed both to his wife in the passanger seat. Crazy ass Canadians.

So we saw Little Big Town and Sugarland last night in Chattanooga. Jennifer Nettles is so goofy and entertaining on stage. I love it. That was the first show we saw where Sugarland wasn't the opener and it was awesome. The place was sold-out. And I made friends with the lady in front of me in line for the bathroom. It was some good times. I love Sugarland!

Jelena sent me some art work a few weeks ago. She bought me a picture by the same artist for my high school graduation and I just can't wait to decorate me trailer with both of them in the fall. Anyway, a card came with the picture and I love, love, love what it says:

"There are things you do because they feel right and they may make no sense and they may make no money and it may be the real reason we are here: to love each other and to eat each other's cooking and say it was good."